Lerkot Posted February 15, 2005 Report Share Posted February 15, 2005 My friend wanted me to post this thing because it was he's first rhyming text and he wants some tip. Personally I think this crap sucks, but it feels better if you say it to him by commenting instead of me saying it ^^ This friend of mine often is heard He doesnt scream and he doesnt sing like a bird But when for example we play a game on my TV He's louder than a rock'n'roll CD When we walk around in the store I can guarantee, for sure, he is hard to ignore I really enjoy people who speak much The thing that annoy me is the fact That he only speak crap Just last week when we walked to a game shop We spoke about everything and he talked without one stop If we were in Singapore we probably had been arrested by a cop But anyway we went in to the shop and saw a sign "Silence, speak online!" I asked the owner"why is that?" "Cus nobody wants to hear a couple of friends chat" I said okey but my friend sounds like an wet cat The owner got upset and started to threat "Sneak out of my store and never come back!" After this surprising shout attack We wondered what to do We went to a mall and took a burger at mcdonalds Most people were normal voiced burghers My friend was a burgher indeed but he spoke loud Like he was talkin to a crowd a hundred mile from stage The place was hot and it feelt like a cage When this girl walked in I put my stomach in to look thin and I went over to her table Hey my name is SB hey let me guess you like horses In that case I got a stable Whata ya say? You like music? Then I got a label! Let me introduce you to my talkative friend I told her that guy is like nuts.. Then he interupted me"But I do like tasty butts" She slapped me in the face And walked away in a speedy pace I said ay yo babe stop im not like that, im kinda quiet, really! She said "Yeah and Philip Banks are on diet" I tried to enjoy here by a laugh but then she said "stay away or i call on the serving staff" I went back to my friend and he was smiling I wondered what and he said "She thought my voice was high and beguiling, she told me she will be dialing" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfuqua23 Posted February 15, 2005 Report Share Posted February 15, 2005 this is his 1st? Well, I say it's fairly good for what it is. Nice subject matter. If he didn't rap it too well, organize the lines better so he can see the flow when he reads. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loco Posted February 16, 2005 Report Share Posted February 16, 2005 If i was him, i would use more double rhymes. But for the 1st one it aight! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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